braydaaan:

am i the only one that feels 2014 doesn’t even sound real

  • Cop: Have you been drinking?
  • Me: I been drankin'
  • Cop: Surfbort
  • Me: Surfbort
  • jallbait:

    "whats cooking good looking"

    "meth"

    intpmusings:

    Sometimes I wonder whether I have any real intelligence or if I just have enough random bits of surface knowledge to bullshit my way through most things.

    kvncause:

Homegirl on a mission

    illkim:

    Teacher: Sit down until the bell rings

    Me:

    image

    super-mario-rpg:

    roxenfel:

    the nintendo ds came out 10 years ago

    image

    unshaped:

    "you can’t copy my homework because our teacher will know that you copied it from me"

    image

    spookynez:

    chaosprancing:

    superwholockgarfield:

    morgrana:

    OMG so I just figured out the word “hurt”

    it’s past, present and future

    you will be hurt

    you are hurt

    you were hurt

    BECAUSE IF SOMETHING TRULY HURT, IT NEVER REALLY STOPS

    you poetic little shit

    it’s because… it’s an adjective… …

    you will be stupid

    you are stupid

    you were stupid

    harry2016:

    image

    i cant believe that is literally beyoncé’s face as she is plummeting off a building

    i am laying down in bed with a double chin

    50shadezofcarter:

    I text back embarrassingly fast

    or three hours later

    there is no in between

    georje:

I FOUND A WHOLE ROOM FULL OF PILLOWS I AM ABOUT TO HAVE THE MOST FUN I WILL PROBABLY EVER HAVE